this morning I hopped into my trusty carro dressed in black to sit amongst truly elect beings, to grieve and celebrate a most precious little girl, to show our love to a family who radiates from every morsel of themselves (children and parents alike), and to be an extra rock for our mutual friend. I knew 4 months ago that I would likely share that moment with them. and when the time did come, nothing could keep me from it.
I drove home touched by all that was beautiful. I was at peace because of their peace. and because of their strength and certainty of purpose and all things good. there are more feelings and thoughts that are just for me and my more regular source of writings (journal). I learned many great things in my short time out of town today. my perspective is forever shifted.
I came home to my sweet home Alabama to get quick directions to celebrate a new life coming soon, and as I was on my merry way I found myself in a big fat totally scary wreck. do you even know how many times I heard today "drive safely" "be careful" and such??? it's true...i was cautioned. but it was not my fault, and i am confident all with be taken care of. oh, and I'm not hurt (i should probably add that). :)
okay, so i reunited with my boy (after the wreck and completely forgoing the baby shower...still shaking and now oober emotionally exhausted) only to hear him speak of his needs to ditch grown ups and reconnect with those of his own size (children). i compromised on a particular amount of time, and my son was off for a short adventure while i regrouped.
and while i was regrouping, i remembered something brought to my attention today. SO funny and I must share. (yep, I said it: funny. the range of emotions today was grand). if you want to laugh (which I think you should), you should check out this spoof of the blog world. i love the light of this perspective because sometimes i find myself totally caught up in it...or feeling weird and guilty if i add something "out of the box" on my own blog. so go there...and laugh.
now it's almost 9pm. i still sit in black, only barefoot now. my home is a beautiful silent sound and i have no choice but to process the day. and i think i should also prepare for a cozy night of cuddling with my cute boy. i need to hold my child particularly close after today's events. do you think I'll be forgiven for missing the ward Christmas party?? cause the guilt is there.
give some extra love to your cars because they get you to all of these beautiful life moments. &kiss your babies tonight because they are precious and perfect.
3 comments:
i can't handle your writing. it's beautiful and calming. sorry about your accident, but glad you had a good day anyway!
Oh, I am so worried now! Even though you sound so very calm. I am not. Are you okay? Will your car be okay. I know cars are not the most important thing in our lives, especially considering our time spent next to each other on Saturday, reminding us of what is the most important, but cars do provide much needed transportation to participate in life! Seeing you, hugging you, talking to you was such a lift for me. It all felt so surreal. Memorializing Sarah, reuniting with my beloved Austin ward family....I asked Matt if he got to talk with you.....I love you, I miss you, I'm worried about things. We will spend tonight and tomorrow with the Giles for another viewing and the burial. The snow is falling and mounting quickly. I will call you some time this week. We have much to talk about. I love you.
hey scharm, i am good, i promise! but still call...we will talk. :)
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