building g, apartment# such&such.

so i used to have a crazy neighbor.
i don't know her reasons for craziness, so i cannot say whether they were ever valid or not (i know all about feeling crazy because of stressors beyond your means or because of choices/cycles/traps that were of your own doing yet you felt powerless to change). so in many ways i am/was empathetic.
however, her situations would strike fear in me. screaming that made me believe someone was screaming through my door on my own doorstep (but they were really at hers down the way..beyond her own closed door). the kind that jolts you out of sleep, and your sleeping babe, and gives your heart that instant 1million beats per second adrenaline rush that keeps you awake and anxious for hours. the kind of feeling that kept me with phone in hand sitting in the dark of my space waiting for that ultimate moment when i knew for certain that extreme harm had taken place.
i also knew there were small children in that home and well, do i even need to explain how much it intensified the fear??
so i shared my concerns with the management. genuine concerns.
one thing led to another and she (my neighbor) called me fat.
cool, huh?
eventually, she was forced to leave for good.

then moving day came for another.

this time a man...with boys for my own offspring to play with. once i called for maintenance because my dishwasher was leaking and my new neighbor came into my tree house answering the call. i learned as he walked into my home and into my kitchen that not only was he was my new neighbor but also my new maintenance man. he did not really reply to my hello, but went straight to work. until a few nights later when he stood on his back porch with the railing full of bottles and cans and funny smells, and his posse of peeps lined up beside him. it was a real warm fuzzy feeling to have him choose that moment to say hello, not at all uncomfortable or trashy feeling.

to add to the initial awkwardness, my new amigo began parking in my parking spot. it's (the spot) declared. it's the only anything that was ever gifted me by my complex. you see, i just signed my 11th lease...my 11th lease! and well, when i reached the 8th (or so) year they gave me a parking space (there is not ONE other amenity in the complex). i was one of two in our complex, only i think i'm the only one left. i say that with awkwardness...it's not the MOSt wonderful place...but alec and i have got a good life inside our walls.

so when homedude started parking in my spot i was like "awe, he doesn't know" except for the big sign that says "reserved for resident of..." after the 7th (or so) (who's counting? oh, i started to back count when he passed 5 daRn times) time of ignoring my big fat sign that says unauthorized people will be towed i started to get a little annoyed. and now it's impossible to count and i'm just flabbergasted.

i told my management (in case he didn't realize, maybe they could tell him...since he works for them and all), and they told me he said "there are a lot of that same color cars that park there and it's not him." never mind that he does it in front of me, taunting almost. the nerve!

it's weird.

it's beyond uncomfortable.

there's no communication until there's the reoccurring row of bottles and cans and funny smelling substances. then he's all about "borrowing sugar" and such.

creepy.

creepy ugly bully man.

creepy ugly bully man who steels my parking spot.

i cannot even begin to explain my deepest desires of a HOUSE for my cute boy and i, and these situations make me scream from the inside out.

hence the post.

hence the venting kind of post.